Strategies for Managing Executive Functioning Challenges
How parents, partners, and loved ones can support people with executive functioning difficulties
Executive functions
Neurodivergent folks struggle with executive functions (EF). There are roughly five categories of EFs, and each person will struggle in different areas.
In this article, I will provide concrete examples of how each EF might look at home, as well as child-centred strategies for supporting loved ones in these areas.
Please note: These strategies are intended as supports or accommodations that parents, partners, or loved ones can make in order to make room for different ways of doing and being.
Accepting and appreciating differences will allow neurodivergent strengths and unique abilities to shine, rather than expecting neurodivergent people to force themselves to do things the neurotypical way.
The five executive functioning categories are as follows:
Cognitive Rigidity
Cognitive flexibility — the opposite of rigidity — describes one’s ability to adapt to change. Children with executive functioning difficulties often struggle with this.
What this looks like at home:
Inflexible cognitive style, difficulty adjusting and adapting to change.
Difficulty with transitions, especially when switching from a preferred activity to a less-favoured activity.
Becomes anxious or upset with unexpected changes in routine.
Black-and-white thinking, rigid with rules or expectations.
Tries to be the adult and “police” the behaviour of siblings, peers, or even adults.
For example, if my son usually gets x number of treats for dessert and one evening he is offered a lesser amount, he will have difficulty accepting this arbitrary limitation of his treats (understandably so, I might add!).
If my son is highly engaged in something, it is quite difficult for him to switch to something else, especially if he considers it less interesting. If he’s enjoying a book, it can be quite a challenge for him to transition to getting ready for school (again, understandably so, I have a hard time putting down books too!).
If either of us has our minds set and have mentally prepared for a particular activity or are expecting one set of events, and there is a change on short-notice, both of us can get quite thrown off.
Unexpected changes cause us anxiety, especially if we’ve spent time mentally preparing for something that is no longer occurring.
Strategies to help
Lead by example
While it’s important to help children (and adults!) develop mental flexibility, we can’t force it upon them. We teach this flexibility by first role-modelling it.
If we’re inflexible and unwilling to compromise when it’s reasonable to do so, we certainly can’t expect our children to learn these skills when we haven’t set an example for them.
The flip side
Cognitive rigidity isn’t all bad, it can also be a cognitive strength. The ability to hyperfocus, or dive deep into a subject or project, can be highly productive and enjoyable.
Organization
Children with executive functioning difficulties may struggle with organizing tasks and materials, estimating time, prioritizing tasks, and getting started on work-like tasks.
What this looks like at home:
Messy bedroom with books, toys, and clothes all over the floor.
Often plays with or uses something, then leaves it where it was and forgets to put it away.
Forgets to put things back where they belong, then can’t find them later.
Difficulties with planning.
Easily loses track of time.
Has difficulty estimating how long something will take to complete — often underestimates how long something will take, and then ends up rushed to get ready on time.
Strategies to help
Working Memory
Working memory allows us to hold information in mind while mentally working with it. Children who struggle with short-term memory may seem to lack comprehension, but it is usually more a matter of difficulty showing what they know.
What this looks like at home:
Remembers complex concepts and understands big-picture ideas, but has difficulty remembering minute details or specific bits of information.
Gets side-tracked easily when following multi-step directions, often forgets what the next step was and has to ask for instructions to be repeated.
Gets distracted easily and forgets what they were supposed to be doing.
For example, my son will go upstairs to get dressed for school. I’ll walk by his room 5 minutes later to find him reading on his bed, still not dressed. He’s not doing this on purpose, he got distracted by a good book, and completely forgot what he was supposed to be doing.
I do the same thing sometimes (okay, frequently). When I’m cooking, I have to set timers, or I will definitely burn something. I get impatient waiting for food to be ready, so I start doing something else while I’m waiting. I become engrossed in whatever I’m doing and completely forget I was in the middle of cooking a meal!
Strategies to help
Impulsivity
Impulsivity, or disinhibition, can be one of the more difficult executive functioning challenges. It’s very important to remember that impulsivity is not a choice someone is making, our impulsive behaviour results from our neurological differences.
What this looks like at home:
Speaking louder than necessary or interrupting others.
Difficulty waiting their turn or waiting for things in general.
May make jokes at inappropriate times, especially if they get a laugh from others.
Gets carried away and does things they later regret.
May be more likely to resort to physical methods of resolving conflict, and to struggle with emotional impulsivity.
Acts without thinking, then can’t explain the reasoning for their behaviour (because there was none — hence the term impulsivity).
Read the rest of my article here.
© Jillian Enright, Neurodiversity MB
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References
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