Neurodiversity and the Politics of Self-Control
ADHD, Twice Exceptionality, and the Benefits of Intensity
ADHD, Neurodiversity, and the Benefits of Intensity
My son and I are intense. We’re passionate people. We feel profoundly, we experience deeply, and we get really excited about some things.
However, neurodivergent people may have more difficulty feeling motivated to complete tasks we do not find enjoyable, and everyday things that neurotypical folks might enjoy are much less interesting for us. Take small talk, for example.
I hate small talk. I often find it painfully boring and, frankly, a waste of time. I understand there is a social aspect to exchanging pleasantries and being friendly, but small talk is not friendly to me, it usually feels artificial and performative.
I love deep conversations. I really enjoy intellectual discussion and debate. I can recall many occasions where I was debating an interesting topic with others and people reacted as though I were becoming “too” passionate. I wasn’t angry or getting upset, I was genuinely and enthusiastically enjoying the exchange.
Emotional intelligence is touted as an important skill for all to have. In its genuine form, absolutely, it is adaptive to be able to regulate one’s own emotions. Unfortunately, the mainstream propaganda around emotional intelligence is nothing more than monetizing the concept of self-control.
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